A black pair of riding boots was the origin of my long journey of eating disorders.
I belonged to a horseback riding stable, where many kids were really good and I practiced with them for competitions.
At the age of 13, I was skinny, but had bigger calves than other riders around. One day, my instructors made fun of me having a hard time getting into my new leather boots, and said “You are the worst rider anyway, so do something about the calves at least!”......
It was also around the time I started feeling insecure about my body.
It was also around the time I discovered that I didn’t want to compete, but didn’t know how to say it to everyone. The rest of the riders were grabbing all the prizes and I felt like I "needed to want" the same. My heart wasn't in the competitions, hence; no good results for many times. I started to feel like...
“I’m just a burden”
“I’m not worthy, I’m not good...
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